Nikolas Leaves His Family, Part II

(Be proud of me- I typed probably two-thirds of this with one hand, on account of my bum wrist)

An hour after leaving his mother’s home, Nikolas had nearly finished packing his belongings. He had scant few things besides that which he needed for his scouting work, so it would only take a knapsack and a couple of satchels to bring what he needed.
He was in the process of packing some spare daggers and arrows when the door to his small cottage practically flew open,
“You’re leaving?”
Nikolas’ sister, Katia, had evidently just come from their mother’s house. He turned to face her and the expected look of shock/frustration on her face.
“Yes,” was his simple reply.
“Why?”
“It shouldn’t be hard to figure out,” he answered.
Katia stared for a moment. “Because of him? Because of Isillien?”
Nikolas scoffed. “Why do you and mother think it’s just because of Isillien? It’s more than that- it’s the whole bloody Scarlet Crusade!”
“But we’re winning! You can’t leave!” The passion in her voice was strong.
“Winning? Is that what you call it?”
“What else is it, then,” she spat back, glaring hard. She had been sharper than Naya in their debates with Nikolas over the Crusade and its ways. “Highlord Mograine is wreaking havoc on the undead near Stratholme, General Abbendis is advancing on the Scourge from Tyr’s Hand, and we’re getting our foothold here in the Western Plaguelands. What more do you want?”
“You really want to ask me that? You’re not winning anything. Yes, you’re gaining ground and bashing the skulls of undead left and right, but at what cost? Killing innocent people, just because they don’t agree with you, is no victory. And I’ve already been through this with Mother, so I have no desire to go over this again.” He returned his attention to packing.
“So you’re abandoning us, then?”
Nikolas remained silent for a moment, which Katia took advantage of.
“It’s just like you playing troll-slayer with the elves. If you’d stayed with us, then you’d have been there to help us fight from the start. But since you don’t like the situation, you’re running away.”
Nikolas drove the dagger he was holding into the table halfway to the hilt. He turned to face his sister again, breathing deeply to contain his anger.
“Believe what you want, little sister, but I have never and will never abandon this family-”
“Then why-” Katia began to interrupt.
“-As long as I believe we are doing the right thing. I have no objection to fighting the undead, and I believe that their complete annihilation should be the goal of every free and living man, woman and child.”
“Then why-” she tried to interrupt again, so Nikolas cut her off even louder.
“But I don’t agree with nor believe in the way the Scarlet Crusade is trying to fight this war. The Crusade and its leadership is corrupt and full of hate, vengeance, and darkness, killing hundreds and thousands who stand in their way, all on the chance that they might be collaborators. The thought of any living soul collaborating with the Scourge is insane! And I can not and will not condone or support the murder of innocent lives, just so you can say ‘better safe than sorry,’ even if it means going a separate path than you and Mother.”
Katia was ready with her answer. “If you loved Father, you’d stay and help destroy those who murdered him.” But Katia was not ready for his response.
Nikolas crossed the distance to his sister in a half a second, burning holes into her plate armor and face with his look.
“Don’t you dare accuse me like that! I loved Father more than you’ll ever know! I was there with him when he died! I saw him murdered! And I have lived with that pain every day since!”
Katia was silent as Nikolas began to pace around the room. He came back to her after a moment.
“No, I didn’t spend as much time around Father as you had. Yes, I was off learning something different than what he wanted. But he respected me and my decision enough to recognize that was what I truly wanted, that I wanted something other than the path he and you chose. He was so proud of you for following the same path he did, for following the Light! And you don’t even recognize that!”
Tears had begun to well up in his sister’s eyes. She was silent for a moment.
“We honor Father by carrying on the battle he fought and died for. And you’re running away.” There was more than a touch of resentment in her voice.
“I’m not running away, little sister.” Nikolas was consciously trying to use a soft tone- he wanted nothing less than to leave on a bitter note. “But the way you and Mother are fighting this war, the way the Crusade is fighting it, is not honoring Father. Isillien claims to teach the Light, and the Crusaders claim to fight by the Light. But if Father were alive, he’d barely recognize the “Light” they use, because their “Light” is riddled with darkness and corruption and murder.”
“How would you know to recognize the Light?” Katia was trying to hold on to her anger, Nikolas thought. “You were never around to study it.”
“I learned it by watching Father. And I know that if he were here, he wouldn’t fight with the Crusade. Not like this. Father wouldn’t want you or Mother to lose yourselves to this corruption for his sake. And you know that’s true.”
Katia turned away to hide her now-flowing tears. But her sobbing gave it away. Nikolas walked over to her and tried to hug her, but she shrunk away from him.
“You’re wrong. You’re wrong about the Crusade, Isillien, Father, everything. And running away only makes you a coward.”
Nikolas’ tone became almost pleading. “Listen to yourself- I’m your brother, Katia. I’m not running from the war, I’m choosing to fight on a different front. I will fight the Scourge, but I will do so as I see fit, as clearly you must do. I hope, I will pray daily that the Light will bring us together again. But while you and Mother choose to walk a path dictated by evil and darkness, our paths must be separate.”
He gripped her shoulders and turned her to face him, although she still looked at the floor.
“Katia, I know that you believe you are doing is right. And I know you and Mother want revenge for Father’s death- I do as well. But I believe that although the Scarlet Crusade may have started by following the tenets of the Light, I can’t help but feel that somewhere along the way they lost sight of it. They’ve let dark thoughts and deeds and motives take over, and all that’s left is a shell of the Order of the Silver Hand, one that even Father couldn’t recognize.”
Katia looked up at him finally, and Nikolas thought he saw both pain and resentment.
“You’re wrong, you know. About everything. You think we’ve forsaken the Light? We battle against the Light’s very enemies. What greater threat could there be to the Light than creatures, abominations whose masters are the element of darkness, demons of the Shadow? And we will defeat them. We will drive them from existence itself, and we will do so by whatever means. We, the Scarlet Crusade, will be the saviors of Azeroth by defeating the Scourge down to the last monster. And on that day, you will see how wrong you were, how scared you were, and how small you are.”
Nikolas stared at her in disbelief- he knew she believed in the Crusade but until now had no idea how deeply its ideology had ensnared her mind. He nodded.
“Time will tell, like you said, little sister. But I fear for you, fear for what this…Crusade…will make of you, and I fear that I won’t recognize the little sister I love and try to protect.”
“I don’t need your protection. By the Light, the Crusade has all the protection I need.”
“Except from yourself.”
The siblings fell silent, Katia staring at Nikolas with cold eyes, he looking back with pity and sadness. Finally, Nikolas spoke.
“I’m leaving as soon as I’ve finished packing. I won’t have to worry about the Crusade arresting me, will I?”
His feeble attempt at humor dispelled some of the tension. Katia shook her head, “I wouldn’t dally if I were you. You aren’t going through the main gate, are you? The Crusade will ask a lot of questions if you just ride up with a bunch of stuff on your horse.”
“Dusk is only an hour away. I’ll go during the evening service.” Part of Nikolas was wary at telling her all his plans, but he felt he had to trust his own sister not to betray him. She wouldn’t, despite the argument they’d just had. “There’s a tree near the wall I can climb. You might want to cut it down after I’m out- easy way for spies to get in.”
“Just take care of yourself. I need someone to argue with after the war is over.”
Nikolas smiled, glad they weren’t leaving on bitter terms.
“I’m not out of this war, little sister. I’ll see you yet.”
“I’ll pray for it. You do the same, okay?”
“I plan to. You take care of Mother, alright?”
Katia nodded, finally calm from their row. She surprised Nikolas by hugging him and delivering a kiss on his cheek, which he gave to her in kind. One last look, then Katia turned and left.

Nikolas Leaves His Family, Part I

The door to Naya Tien’s bedroom opened. She looked up from her task of folding clothes and saw her son, Nikolas, standing there, faintly silhouetted by the firelight from the hearth in the next room.
“You’re back,” she said, relief visible on her face. “Were you seen?”
Nikolas smiled, though a bit weakly, she noticed. “If I was, I must have been scary enough to convince them not to do anything.”
Naya smiled back at her son’s comment. Every time he left to scout the enemy positions, she worried constantly until came back safe. And he always did.
“Anything important to report,” she asked, returning her attention to the clothes.
“Not this time. The Scourge is still well entrenched at Andorhal, and they don’t show any signs that they’re planning to move anytime soon.” Nikolas walked over to the window and sat on the sill, staring out through the glass. The sun would set soon, enveloping the world in darkness.
“Anyone we know die today?” Naya asked the question casually, for long months of war, especially a losing one, had numbed her, her family, and many others in town to death.
“No, not that I know of,” came the quiet reply.
“Then what’s bothering you?” She always knew when Nikolas had something on his mind, something he wanted to get out but couldn’t without prompting.
Nikolas took a deep breath, willing himself to speak. This had been coming for some time now.
“I’m leaving.”
“Where is your assignment this time,” she asked. “Or are you allowed to say?”
“There is no assignment,” was the soft answer.
Naya stopped folding clothes again and looked at her son. He was still looking through the window into the distance, as if trying to see something far off.
“What do you mean?”
Nikolas looked at his mother. “I mean I’m leaving Hearthglen. I don’t intend to return, at least not for a while.”
She laid the half-folded shirt in her hands down on the bed and walked over to the window where he son stood.
“Nikolas, what’s wrong? Tell me, please.”
“You know what’s wrong, mother.”
“Is it Isillien again?”
Nikolas chuckled. “You say that like he’s a schoolyard bully. You say that like I’m a child.”
“But that’s what it is, though,” she continued. They had debated the High Priest often over the last fortnight or so.
“Mother, it’s the same thing it has been for the last few weeks: Isillien, the Crusade, everything.”
“I thought we were over that, Nikolas,” she said, frowning.
“You and Katia are over it. None of this was ever an issue to you or her,” Nikolas responded, his voice becoming more earnest.
Naya assumed a stern look on her face. “Nikolas, why does Isillien bother you so much? Why is he such an obstacle for you?”
“Why do you trust him so much? You don’t really know him,” he shot back.
“I know that he wants to reclaim Lordaeron from the Scourge, something we all want. I know he believes in and uses the power of the Light, something we al believe in. And I know he feels the same pain of loss that our family does.”
Naya put her hand on her son’s shoulder. “Your father’s death is still very hard on all of us. I know, Katia knows, how especially hard it is for you, since you saw him killed- you were there beside him when he was murdered by those undead monsters.” Her voice cracked, and she wiped her eyes, which had become moist from emotion at the topic of Altus Tien’s death.
“It is hard,” Nikolas admitted. “I think about it every day. But is this, what Isillien teaches, the course Father would want us to walk?”
“What do you mean?”
Nikolas stood and started pacing, clearly agitated. “I’m talking about what I always talk about, Mother: Isillien, his teaching, his ‘Scarlet Crusade.’
“Can’t you see how extreme, how dangerous his mind is becoming? He has become so bent on fighting the Scourge, he can’t even see straight.”
“We should all be so dedicated to driving back those monsters,” Naya said, the fervor in her voice rising.
“Aye, and I want them gone as much as anyone, Mother, but at what cost? Isillien’s men have started treating everyone who doesn’t share their zeal or fervor as harshly as they treat the Scourge.”
“What do you mean,” Naya asked, her bow furrowed with concern.
“Isillien and his soldiers are labeling people who don’t follow his teaching and ideas as collaborators. They say that anyone who doesn’t support the Crusade is as good as an enemy like the Scourge, and that if you’re not with the Crusade, you’re against it.”
“And you disagree?”
Nikolas was taken aback at this challenge. “You’re bleedin’ right, I disagree. Mother, we’re talking about rage and a desire for vengeance against the Scourge, and it’s so strong, the Crusade can’t see friend from foe. To them, anyone not in a red and white tabard might as well have sunken eyes and flesh falling off his bones! Innocent people are being imprisoned and even executed because they won’t ‘join the Crusade!’ I’ve seen the executions myself, and it happens away from the eyes of the public. They don’t even get a trial!”
Naya took a deep breath. “I’m sure what you saw had an explanation.”
“But it never does, Mother! Every time I come to you, concerned about what I see in the Scarlet Crusade, you tell me there must be an explanation. But there never is. I talk to soldiers, and they’re silent. I try to get in to see Isillien, but he’s always unavailable. I write my concerns to him, but they go unanswered. And my family won’t listen either- you’re too caught up in Isillien’s teaching and greatness to see that he’s made fools of you all!”
Nikolas didn’t anticipate the strike that came from his mother’s hand to his cheek. She stared into his eyes, anger burning flames behind her own eyes.
“Wanting to destroy the same abominations that murdered your father is not foolish. Wanting to reclaim the home that was ripped away from you and your family is not foolish. It is not foolish to want to banish the same demons who have ruined life itself from the world! They took everything, Nikolas, everything but you and your sister. Isillien wants to claim it back, to try and rescue some small piece of the lives we had before. If extreme measures need to be taken to visit on the Scourge the same destruction and violence and ruin that they have brought to us, then so be it!”
“And what of those who aren’t undead, who don’t want to join this mad Crusade,” Nikolas shot back. Both he and his mother were standing, facing each other and staring hard into each other’s eyes.
“If they won’t help us, they’ll just get in the way. And they’ll just as likely end up as victims of the Scourge, raised to fight against us. It’s better that they die by our hand than by that of the Scourge. We’re doing them a service.”
Nikolas’ expression turned from one of determination to one of incredulity. “Can you hear yourself, Mother? Do you actually understand what you’re saying? You’re talking madness, the same madness Prince Arthas felt at Stratholme.”
“Don’t you dare compare the Crusade to Arthas and his downfall. He fell to the Scourge, yes, because he was beguiled by demons. The only way for us to avoid the same fate is to fight fire with fire, to have the strength to stand against the demons, no matter the cost.”
Nikolas sighed. “You’re talking just like Arthas did, Mother. Father and Uther and the other paladins left Prince Arthas because he talked like that.”
“You leave your father out of this! You don’t know what he would have done!”
“I know he wouldn’t have thrown away what he believed in, all for the sake of revenge.”
There was a long pause. Both continued to breathe, their breath burdened by the heavy conversation.
“And what about me, Mother,” Nikolas began quietly. “You know I don’t believe in the Scarlet Crusade, I don’t approve of their methods and ideology, and I have absolutely no intention of joining them. Am I to be arrested and executed as a collaborator as well?”
Naya was taken aback. “No, of course not,” she said, nearly stammering.
“And why not?”
“You’re different,” came her soft answer.
“And what makes me different,” Nikolas asked. “Why do I deserve special treatment?”
“Because you’re my son- and the son of Altus Tien. The Crusade will respect that,” she said, though to Nikolas, she sounded not altogether convinced.
“Mother, I am no better than anyone out there, much less those who have been murdered in the name of the Crusade. And it’s only a matter of time before one of those…Crusaders…decides I’m not pulling my weight. You know that will happen.”
Naya was quiet for a moment. When she finally spoke, it was almost a whisper.
“So you’re just leaving, then.” It was more of a statement than a question.
Nikolas’ face almost pled for her understanding, though he didn’t expect much of it.
“We don’t share the same view of this Crusade, you and I. I’m as angry and sad and pained as you are over Father’s death. And I want to be rid of the Scourge as much as anyone. But the road you and Katia and the others are choosing to walk is a dangerous one and for me, it heads to dark places. And I will not go down that road. Yes, the Undead are monsters, and yes, we must fight them. But what good is it to fight for our homes if we lose ourselves in that fight? You know I love you, Mother, and I want to stand with you and Katia and finish this war. But you are becoming consumed by revenge and hate, and that is something I can not and will not do. If I can’t be with my family, then I will go and find the place where I am needed. If that’s against the Scourge, so be it.”
He walked up to her. “If it is somewhere else, then that is where I will be.” An embrace and he kissed her on the forehead. Naya started to cry, but did not notice the tears in her own son’s eyes as he whispered into her ear.
“Come and find me anytime.”
And with that, Nikolas turned around and left.